RECIPE: Orange Creamsicle Brownies

Welcome to my new favorite series, “I bought a box of brownie mix at Costco, and therefore have to make brownies with it.” Recipe 2 of 6: Orange Creamsicle Brownies! Well, more like orange cheesecake brownies. Either way, BROWNIES. (You can find part one here and some more brownies here!)

I can’t take credit for this idea; Andrew came up with it. He also requested that you be able to see the orange part, not just orange zest mixed into the brownies. In addition, they had to be orange creamsicle brownies, not just orange brownies. At first, I was thinking of covering them with frosting or an icing once baked, but both of those involve waiting while they cool, and one of my strengths is not waiting for brownies to cool. Therefore, orange cream part had to be something that could bake along with the brownies, and THAT means cream cheese brownies

All it takes to turn regular brownies (or unfancy orange brownies) into Orange Creamsicle Brownies is a package of cream cheese, egg, some sugar, and orange zest (or you could just make an orange cheesecake. OR AN ORANGE CHEESECAKE WITH A BROWNIE CRUST!!). You could also turn these into any flavor you’d like! Want lemon cream? Add lemon zest. Strawberry cream? Zest some strawberries! Snozzberry cream? Well, too bad. That doesn’t exist, and you aren’t a wizard, Harry!

Okay, something has always bothered me about Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory for being absurdly unrealistic. No, it’s not when Veruca falls into a pit of garbage for being a bad egg. Maybe it is the pipe full of melted chocolate that sucks up Augustus? Anyone who has watched The Jetsons knows that that totally happens. Is it when Violet turns into a puff resembling a blueberry? She is having AN ALLERGIC REACTION! HER FACE TURNED BLUE BECAUSE SHE COULDN’T BREATH FROM THE SWELLING. Is it the transportation of Mike into the tv? Obviously, that is just a commentary on how the media traps us and, as a result, only allows us to see what they decide to show us. Duh.

No. It’s the glass elevator. IT BREAKS THROUGH THE ROOF!

First of all, why doesn’t it have a trap door that opens?

And the elevator is just floating around? It’s not in outer space. Will it fall to the ground? Does it break due to being made of glass? Is there enough air while they are floating in the sky?

Do the Oompa Loompa’s have to go track it down and drag it back to the factory? Finally, what if Willy Wonka accidentally pushed the wrong button one day? Oh, sorry Oompa Loompa’s, you need to fix the roof so it’s ready to be shattered to pieces again when/if some random kid who found a golden ticket decides NOT to give away the Everlasting Gobstopper to Slugworth so Wonka can retire and give the factory to the lucky kid who has now inherited the remaining survivors of an entire race of people, the scandal of being just like “meh” while a girl falls into the garbage incinerator, and a factory with a broken roof, all because someone pushed the wrong button. Seems like the ultimate prize to me!

UGH.

Also, please don’t zest your strawberries, just mash them up a little with the back of a fork. But if you do zest them, let me know, I’m kind of curious as to what would happen!

Cheesecake brownies, anyone?

INGREDIENTS FOR ORANGE CREAMSICLE BROWNIES

• One box brownie mix
• Whatever the box says you need for brownies
• One package of cream cheese, softened
• One egg
• 1/4 cup sugar
• The zest of one orange

DIRECTIONS FOR ORANGE CREAMSICLE BROWNIES

1. In a medium sized bowl, mix your cream cheese and sugar together until well combined. Or, if you are like me and too lazy to get out any sort of non-manual mixing equipment and instead use a fork, consequently giving up before it is well combined, resulting in lumps.
2. Once well combined (or not), mix in the orange zest and egg and set aside.
3. Do whatever the box of brownie mix tells you to do because the brownie box knows best.
4. Pour your orange cheesecake batter creation into an 8×8* pan and drizzle-pour on top of brownie mix (or spoon out like dumplings into soup, in my case).
5. Do the fancy knife swirling thing.
6. Bake according to what your box says.
7. Eat the orange brownies.
8. Store leftovers in the fridge. At least that’s what I did because it has cheesecake on top, and you keep cheesecake in the fridge. I don’t know if they need to be, but maybe you are one of those weird people who not only eat Miracle Whip but also keeps it in the cabinet and not the fridge. Don’t give me that look; I know you are out there!

*An 8×8 pan works well because you don’t overcook the orange cheesecake and/or undercook the brownies, but if you’d rather use a different size, go crazy!

xx